Wednesday, January 23, 2013
enhance your anti-factors
Unnecessary stress leads to a state of bodily or mental tension resulting from factors that tend to alter an existent equilibrium. Therefore, science anti-factors are needed to undo and eradicate these undesirable stress factors. Anti-factors are actually positive plutonium particles obtained using a patented process to distill plutonium from ordinary materials. Let me explain how this works. In 1947 famous Norwegian scientist Bjornstjerne Bjorneboe discovered a psychoreactive compound known as vikingfjord, which at room temperature assumes liquid form. Upon accidentally ingesting some of this liquid, Dr. Bjorneboe suddenly conceived of a process by which it could be transmuted into anti-factors and immediately patented his procedure. We now call this procedure Process G, since it has been shown by Mayan daykeeper and historical archivist Hunbatz Men that "G" is a letter with mystical properties. It's symbolic form in ancient Mayan resembles a swirling image of our Milky Way galaxy. In fact, "galaxy" itself begins with G! How can this be explained? Somehow ancient Mayan astronomers must have been aware of Process G and used it to transmute their stress factors and produce mystical hieroglyphs. To unravel these ancient Mayan mysteries and bring them into modern times using Dr. Bjorneboe's techniques, we have incorporated anti-factor technology into our new G-Machine time travel device. This device uses positive plutonium particles to travel back to ancient Mayan civilization where you can live a stress-free existence for up to 30 minutes, while tied to a stone "relaxation table" on top of Chichén Itzá's Kulculcán pyramid, before being released by a sacred shaman to join bird-god Quetzal Coatl on a higher "transcendental plane."